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Hey Star Mommas and Moon Pappa's!  This is your guide to the cosmos, Chaz Comet, comin' atcha with this week's horoscope.



This week, the moon is going to be rising into the disco heavens, so it's time to put on your best digs, pimp walk to the station, get off the train at Funky Town, and get down. 



Aquarius:  The water's gonna slide in and let you ride the wave, man.  Just make sure your feet are firmly planted and you don't end up in the drink. 



Someone might tell you that, "It's the last straw," and try to bury you.  Don't let them. 



Aries:  Take a step back from who you think you are.  Observe your thoughts.  When you realize that the person you're with is just there to cover up a secret, throw a party.



Pisces:  There are plenty of fish out there.  You don't need to get down on yourself before you're getting down with others. 



Just relax, and enjoy the swim.



Taurus:  So the public at large doesn't get your sense of humor when you're loaded.  What's important is that the people who matter most to you do.  You're lucky to have this kind of support.  Have you told them that lately?



Gemini:  The 'twins' are a force in you to be reckoned with.  Talk with the people who have the ability to make your ideas a reality.



Cancer:  A jaded lover might slip and do something they regret.  Just remember that they only hit you because they care.



Leo:  Outside forces may make you seem the fool, but everything's cool, and you're bad. 



Just make sure your enthusiasm is contagious.



And once everyone has had a turn...



You can really turn it up.



Don't worry, everyone will still follow your lead.



And you'll be able to celebrate in the background. 



Virgo:  Put your personal desires on hold.  We're not going to see peace until everyone's fingernails are as long as yours.



Libra:  Watch your consumption.  It'll lead you into greener pastures...



You just need to make sure it all goes down right.



Scorpio:  Look for a way to contribute to a social cause. Not only will this take your mind off a situation at home, but your self-confidence will get a much needed boost when you see how hot you look on the internet.



Sagittarius:  Keep the ones you love close, and you'll always be able to turn the other cheek.



Oooooohh  Ooooh oh oh oh.  Do it!  Do it!  Do the hustle!



Do it! 



The hustle!



The angels are going to watch over you, whether you want them to or not.  And you want them to.



In the cusine section of this horoscope, I'm reccomending you stick things with forks and dip them into pots of hot liquid. 



You dig?  And some lubrication never hurt a party.



Catch you on the flipside!

Date: 2006-06-15 06:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nothingjerk.livejournal.com
man this reminds me of The Drugs Years on VH1 I've been eatching this week.
I can dig

Date: 2006-06-15 06:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] quba.livejournal.com
I told everyone that they had to bring 'ludes and Amyl Nitrate. No dice!

Date: 2006-06-15 06:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] nothingjerk.livejournal.com
man thats lame, was there at leats a salt shaker filled with cocaine?

Date: 2006-06-15 08:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] calamityjon.livejournal.com

DAMMIT LADIES, IT IS "KARATE HANDS - WALKIE TALKIE - GUN," NOT "GUN - GUN - GUN!!"

Date: 2006-06-15 08:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pandabug.livejournal.com
This will be corrected in future Charlie's Angels renditions.

Date: 2006-06-17 06:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] manningkrull.livejournal.com
I'm with you, Alun Clewe!

OH DAMN

Date: 2006-06-16 02:00 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] resident-raptor.livejournal.com
I must say my favorite shot is the one where Doug's mustache serves as his awkward chest hair.

Brilliant. I give him polite golf claps of approval followed by a 'Hooplah!'.

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August 2006

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